5 Ways to Boost Serendipity

Serendipity, the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way, is a huge asset and key to thriving and making your next chapter your best chapter. Not only do these “happy accidents” improve your life, serendipity renews your faith by helping you see that life isn’t just a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences. Instead it’s a tapestry of events that culminate in a beautiful, sublime, Divine plan.

But can serendipity be tapped? Can it be harnessed to increase your chance of success?

Absolutely! Serendipity doesn’t happen to you. It happens because of you. There are dozens of ways you can increase your luck. Here are five of my favorites.

1. Show up

We all get invited to events or have a chance to be part of experiences. However at midlife we don’t always have the energy and desire to show up and take advantage of situations. It’s easy to hide, hesitate and make excuses – I’m busy, this is too expensive, I’m tired … but to harness serendipity you must step outside your comfort zone, increase social actions and show up. When you do you put yourself in the right place at the right time to make powerful connections that can alter the course of your life. So show up, pay attention to what’s happening around you, look for ways to connect with others and be a beacon of light.

2. Say Yes

I’m a big fan of boundaries and saying no to people, places and things that don’t serve your highest good. However it’s also important to know when to say yes. Saying yes and… (Rather than yes, but…) opens doors and creates an environment that triggers opportunities.

3. Be resilient

Resilience isn’t just about being tough enough to bounce back. It’s also about how you stay balanced and respond to tough stuff like job loss, health scares, divorce or trauma. It powers up serendipity because resilience enables you to keep moving forward even when life is challenging. You learn to take responsibility for and respond to what is happening to you rather than feeling like a failure or a victim.

One of the most powerful ways to boost resilience is practicing self-compassion. You can do this in three ways:

Be kind to yourself rather than judgmental
Recognize common humanity: In challenging situations, recognize that everyone fails, falters and makes mistakes – it’s part of the human condition. This can help you to stop viewing yourself as a victim with a problem and instead see challenges as learning opportunities.
Be mindful. When shit happen rather than plowing through and trying to fix everything, take a moment to turn towards yourself and ask: What do I need right now to feel better? Then do it!

4. Be optimistic

Optimism like self-compassion can be learned. You can boost optimism not only by expecting the best and seeing the glass as half full, but also by reframing difficulties using the ABCDE method, developed by psychologist Dr. Martin Seligman, the father of positive psychology.

To do this when an adverse (A) event happens notice what beliefs (B) are triggered. Next consider the consequences (C) of holding these beliefs. Once you know the ABCs Dispute (D) them. Finally notice how your Energy (E) changes after your Disputation.

For example if you didn’t get the job you wanted (which can trigger the belief that I’m not good and the consequence is not pushing forward with apply for more jobs) ask yourself: What’s good about this situation and what’s good about me? Question your negative beliefs and generate at least one piece of evidence that points out that your negative thoughts are false.

5. Be appreciative

While there’s nothing wrong with dreaming big and creating a life you love, sometimes we try so hard to generate what we want that we end up exhausted and frustrated. We forget that happiness is an inside job and is always available.

Take a moment to be grateful and enjoy what you have. Appreciate the good in your life and the good things in your life will appreciate. You will see that your life is already magnificent which will generate more good luck and enable you to see it when it shows up.

Having trouble appreciating your self? Consider the incredible things that had to happen for you to be alive starting with the Big Bang and ending with your parents conceiving you. WOW!

Whatever happens to you in life your life is already serendipitous. So stop focusing on what you don’t have and focus on and enjoy what you do. In the words of Einstein, “There are only two ways to look at your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”